so long, and thanks for all the fish.

2014 hasn't been kind to the nation and is going out screaming and kicking with massive floods in the East Coast and a crashed flight, but in the face of pains and fears and uncertainties, I want to wrestle a shred of hope for myself by bringing to mind all the good things that have also happened and be thankful for them.

As I went through my 2014 blog posts and also Facebook (srsly, I'm so thankful for social media otherwise my life is essentially gone with the wind), I am repeatedly reminded that I am blessed beyond measure, and how could I not when I have..

• these gals
• this miracle 
• this new look 
• this wedding
• this farewell
• this food trip
• this work trip
• this drive
• this family
• these friends
• and these
• and these
• this boy 
• and this
• this hobby
• these songs
• this musical
• this list
• this opportunity
• this milestone
• this charity, and 
• this reunion?

And on this high note, I bid this blog goodbye. Kinda :( but I'll hold it in. See you on the other side!

theevanescentloafer.blogspot.com

Ooh check out Dictionary.com's Word of the Day... It's a sign! A sign of what, you might ask. Stay tuned, you'd soon find out. Jeng jeng jeng..

another cul-de-sac.

I find it amazing that I still blog. Almost everyone I knew who has a blog when I published my first post has long given up their digital pen. Personally I don't even follow any blog anymore. I used to read from Google Reader without fail each day, but I guess they foresaw that blogs are dying when they shut the site down eighteen months ago (that's 18 million years in internet age). I hopped over to another another feed aggregator, but I somehow stopped reading blogs around the same time. Now it's all Medium, Buzzfeed, HuffPost, TheMalaysianInsider, Cilisos, Bored Panda and what not, with the occasional posts from Jamie and Caleb.. and once in a while when J mentions it, Uncle Beck. So I guess, blog is dead?

I'll leave it to the social media commentators to debate on that, I just wanna "announce" that I'll be closing this blog soon, in 7 days to be exact. Butttt... it's not like I'm going to stop writing though. It's just that I found myself another new place, and I'll post the link up at the strike of midnight when 2014 ends. So yeah, no drama here. :)

But wow. I can't believe that I've been blogging for ten years *snap fingers* just like that. But given that my blog is not very different from my diary, as a matter of fact, it's practically the same thing in different format, it's not very surprising la, I've been journaling since I was a wee lass anyway. I want to capture these mini moments so that I won't lose myself when I get older. It's meant to supplement my Facebook presence. And Twitter. And Instagram. Haha, social media wasn't even a word when I started blogging. Gosh, confirm dinosaur haha! 

Anyway, I have really liked it here. I don't think I'm an interesting person, but this is me. The good side, at least. Thanks for reading and keeping quiet. I don't need to know who you are lest I get too self-conscious when writing, but I'm happy to see the pageview counter number rising albeit slowly. So yeah, thanks.. and come join me at my new blog? :)


Read my previous blog closing note: cul-de-sac

This year's loot, courtesy of the Big Bad Wolf. That's 25 books for RM221, and if that ain't a steal, I don't know what is.

I didn't realise I bought so many books until last night when I stacked them up and counted. My ignorance was most likely because I went twice to the sale the past two weeks. 

Didn't plan to go the second time, but A told me they added new books so I thought I should give it another round. Wasn't expecting much as my first trip there wasn't as exciting as the previous years', but I ended up with almost as many books as my first round. 

This includes a number of memoirs, some graphic novels, a few Lisa See's and some random titles.. a good mix I'd say.

Bah, I haven't even finished last year's books so I doubt I'd finish this year's in the next 365 days, but I couldn't resist adding these to my shelves. *swoons* 

I know I'm not going to meet my target reading this year (I'm at least five books behind and there's only two weeks till the year ends..) but I can be hopeful about 2015 right? Right! :) (I might jussst make it. Just checked and found out that I am only ONE book behind. This is doable!)

ADD, subtract, multiply and divide

I may be a quack, but I'm pretty sure I have ADD. I've known this for a while, I mean, how could I not have it? Like this list of symptoms, I could definitely use it as a framework for my biography/memoir.

Lack of Focus. Possibly the most telltale sign of ADD, “lack of focus” goes beyond difficulty paying attention. It means being easily distracted, finding it difficult to listen to others in a conversation, overlooking details, and not finishing work or projects.

Me: Check. Check. Check. Check. Check. :\

Hyper-focus. While people with ADD are often easily distractible, the flip side of the coin is called hyper-focus. While engaged in an activity they like, a person with ADD/ADHD can be so engrossed in something that they are ignorant to anything else around them. This kind of focus makes it easier to lose track of time, ignore those around you, and cause relationship problems.

Me: This is also true. And yes, it's caused me trouble. :\

Disorganization. Life can seem chaotic for everyone at times, but someone with ADD experiences a more hectic life on a regular basis. You may have problems with time management, keeping track of tasks, procrastination, chronic lateness, and prioritizing.

Me: Did someone say procrastination? I am your Queen. But I don't have problem with chronic lateness -- I'm pretty punctual when I'm expected to be someplace. That said, I'm among the last person to step into the office every day. But that's just cos I'm not a morning person, but mostly, it's because I could get away with it. 

Forgetfulness. For someone with ADD, forgetfulness is a part of life. This includes routinely forgetting where you’ve put something or important dates. Some can be menial, while others can be serious. The bottom line is that forgetfulness can be damaging to careers and relationships because it can be confused with carelessness.

Me: This word practically defines my existence! XD

Impulsivity. Impulsivity in someone with ADD can manifest as interrupting others during conversation, being socially inappropriate, rushing through tasks, or acting without much consideration to the consequences. A person’s shopping habits are often a good indication of ADD. Impulse buying, especially on items they can’t afford, is a common symptom of adult ADD.

Me: Mm, while I am impatient and have the tendency to be impulsive, I rarely succumb to impulse buying. 

Emotional Problems. Life with ADD can seem chaotic, as though your emotions are on a constantly up-and-down journey. You can easily become bored and go looking for excitement on a whim. Small frustrations can seem intolerable or bring on depression and mood swings.

Me: Not as severe as described, but I'm practically strapped on and stuck on a perpetual emotional roller coaster ride. Somebody get me off this!

Poor Self-image. Adults with ADD are often hypercritical of themselves, which can lead to a poor self-image. This is due in part of their inability to concentrate and other symptoms that may cause problems in school, work, or relationships. You may view these difficulties as personal failures or underachievement, which can cause you to see yourself in a negative light.

Me: Yeah, this. :( I'm not even a perfectionist sigh.  

Lack of Motivation. While you might be open to doing everything at once, you also may feel unmotivated. This is problem commonly seen in children with ADD who can’t often focus on schoolwork, but it also can happen with adults. Coupled with procrastination and poor organizational skills, it may be difficult for an adult with ADD to finish a project because they can’t focus for long periods of time.

Me: *cries* MEMANG BENAR!

Restlessness & Anxiety. As an adult with ADD, you may feel like your motor can’t shut off. Your yearning to keep moving and doing things can lead to frustration when you can’t do something immediately. This yields to restlessness, which can lead to frustrations and anxiety. Anxiety is a common symptom of adult ADD, as the mind tends to replay worrisome events repeatedly.

Me: Not all the time, but when I'm restless, I'm restless. 

Relationship Issues. An adult with ADD often has trouble in relationships, whether they are professional, romantic, or platonic. The traits of talking over people in conversation, inattentiveness, and easily being bored can be draining on relationships as a person can come across as insensitive, irresponsible, or uncaring.

Me: I just want to say that I've been blessed with a wonderful hubby and awesome friends who are able to take my nonsense. But still, I am aware of how weird I am, and I'm wary to opening myself up.

I've seen people harness their weaknesses for good. I want to do the same too. Wish me the best.

So I watched The Girl Who Leapt Through Time (時をかける少女 Toki o Kakeru Shōjo) and I.. hmm, can't decide if I liked it.

I've said before time travel is an iffy topic to tackle, and I don't quite like how it was done here.. but that's my personal bone to pick. There are other questions as well, and the more I think about it, more of them arose so much so now I'm filled with them.. But there was one part though where I got caught up in the moment that I suppose did make the movie worth it, and it's in one of the images below. :)

Pacing wise, it was a bit slow in the beginning, and by the time it picked up, it was almost over. If I wasn't folding my mountain of laundry, I might not have the patience to sit through it. Style and colour wise, it was okay, it didn't stand out very much but it suited the mood of the story nicely. Mm that's all I've got to say. :D

Watch it here.









and one last one for the lols (that's me btw, photobombing J's dad, and that's my MIL in the background hehe):

5 Centimeters Per Second ( 秒速5センチメートル Byōsoku Go Senchimētoru) has got to be the most gorgeous anime I've ever seen. I love, love, LOVE it. The cinematography, art direction, digital animation, colours and lighting were all superb. The story line however is not uncommon, of young love and loss and yearnings, but it was very well portrayed. It was a slow movie, like really slowww.. which should have been a setback for me, plus it's romance drama, my least favorite sub-genre of my least favorite genre, but I was so enthralled that I didn't notice it until I read some reviews. The short running time (63 minutes) helped, and I could relate what was going on-screen and was just drinking in the beautiful scenery, shot after shot. Ahh, such bliss..

The show is divided into three so-called chapters. I don't want to go into details so you can read them here. I want to point out though that many reviews didn't think too much of the second chapter, but it was the very one that touched me the most because I saw myself as the girl who has a crush on our male protagonist but not being able to express it, knowing well that his mind is occupied with another, but at the same time she keeps trying to create opportunities to be close to the person.. it was almost like a chapter out of my youth. Given that almost the entire film happened during the early 1990's when there weren't Facebook or mobile phones or instant messaging, it could very well have been my story hehe. I was surprised how most reviews I've read dismissed this chapter, some didn't even mention her and there was one who felt her presence was extraneous.. I actually felt that this lovelorn girl was just as central to the show if not more as the other two, but I guess every reviewer sees differently. (Edit: After reading more reviews, I take back what I said about Ch 2 being overlooked :)

Anyway, I'm listening to the OST now, totally enrapt. Just gonna leave some screenshots here..

Watch it here.

the birthday post.

I'm 36! :)

Gliding into this age loved and grateful and humbled. It's a great day to be alive.

The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he refreshes my soul. He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake. Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. Woot!

P/S: Still think I'm 30. ;)

I've had questions without answers
I've known sorrow, I have known pain
But there's one thing that I cling to
You are faithful, Jesus You're true

When hope is lost, I call You Saviour
When pain surrounds, I call You Healer
When silence falls
You'll be the song within my heart

In the lone hour of my sorrow
Through the darkest night of my soul
You surround me, and sustain me
My defender for ever more

And I will praise You, I will praise You
When the tears fall still I will sing to You
I will praise You, Jesus praise You
Through the suffering still I will sing to You

When the laughter fails to comfort
When my heart aches, Lord are You be there
When confusion is all around me
And the darkness is my closest friend
Still I'll praise You, Jesus praise You

Tim Hughes :: When The Tears Fall

Had my first Skype interview last night. Not sure if this would lead any where, but it was an interesting experience. :)

Another song that I've been playing to death. It's from Puteri Gunung Ledang's movie soundtrack. For some reason I didn't think that I'd like it because it's such a slowww song, but it quickly grew on me. :)

Btw the reunion concert for the musical has been postponed to March 2015 as Tiara Jacquelina has been stricken with vocal cord nodules. Kinda bummed out about the postponement because I've been so looking forward to it and I've been looping the musical soundtrack the entire month, but I totally understand that she needs the rest. I hope she recovers soon! :)

The last song off the last album of them together as a band. They are on their farewell tour now -- too bad they won't get here. I'll miss them. Thanks for the music, guys! :)

We'll live together, forever, forever...

hello, November.

So we are entering into my most favorite month, no prize for guessing why haha! I think November is the Friday night of month. Like how Friday is the beginning of the weekend, November is the beginning of the end of the year, and like how the whole weekend is still ahead, it feels like there's still time at this point to revisit the year's plan and resolutions and work towards ticking off more items off the bucket/resolution list. Holidays are looming and half the fun is in the anticipation. Christmas will soon be in the air, but it's not quite there yet, no rush for gift buying, no pressure for year end activities. The new year is still kinda far away. I love November. :)

Revisiting a song here. Quoting the bits I like. Leaving out the bits I don't. This is so me, right? :)

I know a girl whose head is in a twirl
She has her own lovely little world
And cause she likes me I get to look inside
And when I do the things that I see
Like trips to Spain and houses in the trees
Makes me wish that my mind was just as free

So baby, I know it's fun to play
And let your thoughts drift away
Dreamer, that's what you are

Mayer Hawthorne :: Fantasy Girl (Cover)

Finally, today I found out what it really was. Haha! Took me long enough...

Have you ever heard a word?
Rather be lonely in love, than alive with you and dead
Have you ever heard a word?
Hear me out this time (Hear me out this time)
Have you ever heard a word?
Rather be lonely in love, than alive with you and dead.
Have you ever heard a word?
Hear me out this time (Hear me out this time)

Anberlin :: There Is No Mathematics To Love And Loss

i sure know how to embarrass myself :\

horror of horrors.

so last night i went back to my parents' place because they had a harvest of bananas and asked me to go back for some. the hubby wasn't free so i went back alone which i'm usually okay with cos it's my old home and i practically grew up there.. but then again, i haven't been back in a while as they have moved out, only that they go back there every morning to cook and prepare soyabean drinks for sale. oh have I mentioned my old house is right smack in the middle of a Chinese cemetery? it doesn't bother me though---I've never had any eerie experiences of any sort. it's just a place where home was.

the thing is, it is not so much the spirits than the serpentine that bother me. as i was reaching home, i remembered how my parents have been telling me about their recent encounterSSS with SNAKES OMG. if there are two things that i am most terrified of, they are syringes/needles and SNAKES. just thinking about them can make me stop dead in my track---i have vivid imagination, what can i say. anyway they told me about this HUGE snake (i think it's python) that they have seen around and how fast that bloody thing moves and all.

my imagination was already going wild the whole time but i didn't realise how scared i was until i parked. my parents were not home and it was quite dark all around. i left my car ignition and lights on and i walked to the back of the house to get in. the house is this dilapidated structure (my parents built it around the time i was born and it's made of wood and hasn't stood the test of time---anyone up for a tour haha) and it wasn't very well lit and images of snakes flying out from nowhere and mauling me had me close to tears - ok I cried a bit - it was a page right out of a horror movie okay no kidding.

i was so petrified that i stood at some spots for so long, wondering if i should turn back.. but i kept inching forward (like a classic protagonist who's gonna die in the next scene). getting into the house took spy-like ability (old house, tricky locks) and i was using my phone as flashlight but it was running out of battery so i had to get in before it was all dark. of all the days i didn't keep it charged.. -_-

i got in after some fumbling about and i stopped and looked at every spot in my house where i've previously seen a snake, half expecting one there. and i couldn't see where my parents left the bananas and they didn't pick up my calls until a good few times later. all i could only think about was my imminent death by then.. stuff like if i would have time to text everyone a farewell message, and which order that would go, or if i should just send a mass text in case i died quick.. my heart was pounding the whole time and my body was so tense and i probably heard my blood coursing through every vein and capillary.

thank God kitty was home and her meowing provided some assurance to me. i suppose if there were danger she would be hissing with hair standing up instead of rubbing herself against me and trying to get me to pet her, right? i was told that the bananas were in my old room which is like this spooky and dark room and again i contemplated whether to just leave empty handed. but i thought if i survived this, my parents might not be so pleased so i soldiered on. i ran in, quickly took a comb and dashed out of the room and patted the cat and left the house with my heart intact but really, what an ordeal i had to suffer for a bunch of bananas.

home schome, i am srsly never ever going back there alone again.

Here's a rundown of what happened last weekend if I don't get to write about the activities in details (I would love to, but hmm don't know if I have the time).

On Friday, the girls and I went for our US visa interview, and we got it! That's one step closer for us, a major hurdle crossed. Now down to getting the flight tickets and planning the itinerary. Am super excited -- obviously. Spent the late morning celebrating at a cafe in Ampang Hilir, and had a nice chat -- haven't met up like this in a while. I miss it. And guess we won't have the chance to do the same for another year, since S is moving to China to teach. Sigh. Went back to work. Was supposed to roll out a project but it didn't happen. Was miffed. On Fri night, I completed watching Death Note (got that write up out!)

On Saturday, I woke up early cos the hub said we should go hiking. He got lazy. I couldn't sleep after getting an email from my colleague about said project which incensed me. Didn't bother with work thereafter. We went for pork noodle brekkie in OUG and then in the afternoon I started reading Lisa See's Peony in Love. I decided that I should read in a book between my anime, because I should. That evening, I went to watch P Ramlee The Musical with J and M, and it was awesome. The night couldn't have ended on a higher note than when Tiara Jacquelina announced the Puteri Gunung Ledang Reunion Concert next month end. I was delirious.

On Sunday, we went for nasi lemak brunch at Village Park DU, and then spent the rest of the afternoon in Canaanland bookstore. Were poorer by RM400++ but so happy that I got some new books. Since we were not hungry, we spent the next couple of hours at a cafe in TTDI and read some more. More reading when I got home, and then it was the end of the day.

'Twas a quiet but another really awesome weekend. :)

I don't know why it didn't cross my mind to watch Death Note earlier on, but boy am I glad I did. I LOVE it! I read the manga back then and liked it, but I never went very far into the plot as copies were hard to come by. I love the characters, the drawings, the pace, the drama and the story line. Ok, not totally and I need to clarify that. But I can't do it without spoilers, so please click on the link after this image below to continue reading. Don't do it if you plan to watch the show. I'd totally recommend this to anyone who hasn't though. For me, it was definitely a worthy show to catch after the brilliant Steins;Gate, since I had worried about finding something I'd like that would match up.

Oh speaking of a worthy successor, I did start Cowboy Bebop since it was so highly recommended, but sorry fanboys and -girls, it didn't do anything for me and I stopped after Ep 4. I am not a fan of dated drawing (the anime came out in 1998, so the quality of the drawing -- to simplistic -- reflects its age) so it was hard for me to go through with it. Also I'm not fan of spaceships or bounty hunters.. I might be rewarded if I stayed on, apparently the show touches on deeper human issues like existentialism and other philosophical stuff.. but mm, mayybe another time ok? I guess why it appeared on the top of so many lists was because those people watched it when it first came out, and so it was a huge part of their childhood.. and nostalgia is a strong factor in such lists. To each her own... at least I checked it out. :)

awesome weekend is awesome.

Dear Diary

I had a superduperagilisticexpilidixious weekend and I am still smiling thinking about it!

It all started last Friday evening after work. I got home early, before the sunset. Saw my neighbor washing her porch and she remarked, "Awal balik hari ini?" And I was like, "Ya, ya :)" That evening, I had roast chicken from Isetan for dinner and also tackled my mountain of unfolded laundry while watching the remaining 12 episodes of the the 25-episode anime I've been watching, called Steins;Gate (stream here). It's basically about time travel which is one of the toughest topic to tackle in a show or writing, and very few get it right. I am superbly nit-picky about how the concept is applied -- I'd buy any theory put forth by a writer, but it's crucial that it remains consistent throughout -- and hence I'm usually not interested in picking up anything related to TT because most writers fumble through it, or they'd start off right and then conveniently bend the rules they have established to suit the plot, which annoys me because I am simple-minded and easily confused. But this one, it stuck to its rules and while I did get lost here and there, I wouldn't stray too far and was able to get back on track because they are consistent. Actually, I only watched this because many reviews actually highlighted this point, and it paid off. I am glad! ^_^

Although I have not watched that many anime to-date, but if what everyone says is true, this is truly one of the best there is. While it started off slow, when it hits its stride about 10 episodes in, I was kinda blown away.. Looking back, I think the slow build-up was necessary to establish the characters because these were revisited later on. I love the style of the animation, the characters (some minor gripes though), the story line, the colours, the direction.. I felt everything was perfectly held together.

The only problem I had after this is deciding what to watch next. The thing is, this anime is highly rated (so thanks, Quora, for the recommendation) so my expectations are kinda raised. I have bookmarked a few other potentials though, so I might just randomly select one of them. In the meantime, there's always have the long-running Gintama that's good for a few chuckles. Actually, there's this anime called Cowboy Bebop that has appeared on almost all top lists I've came across so far, but I hesitate because the title is like so bleh and the protagonist's hairstyle (yes I just said that) is like so messy. Anyways.

In between watching I texted the husband who is in the most populous nation on earth to see how he was doing. He was going back to the City after a week out in the woods. Okay, not woods, but somewhere remote. He brought some people along for this trip so he had more time to relax. I fell asleep two episodes before I finished the series, but I still had the whole weekend before me.

So, that was Friday evening and it was good and I went to bed wearing the hugest smile.

On Saturday, I woke up early to clean the house. I finished up putting away the laundry I folded the night before and then I swept and mopped the floor before rushing out for my hair appointment with Alex in BU. I was running late because I was moving like a snail but decided to drop by a bakery and get them some cakes from RT in Taman Desa. Traffic was slow heading towards PJ, but the weather was good like my mood. Got there about 10 minutes late but he was okay with it. According to him, I haven't had a hair cut in four months since M's wedding so my hair was kinda long and unruly. Told him to chop off a third of it so right now, it is short and unruly, like I have a bunch of seaweed on my head. I can only hope that it would be okay when it grows out a bit. It's a losing battle that I fight with my crowning glory so for now, I'm just resigned to the fact that this is as good as it gets.

Anyway, after I was done, I went to pick D up from his place and spent the rest of the day with him. We had Nando's for the n-th time because it's his most favorite food ever and he is the most unadventurous eater I know, but I would not tease him anymore after J kindly pointed out that my obsession with fish head is essentially the same thing. Touche. We had a whole bird and were practically stuffed after the meal. And for some reason, he was being particularly obnoxious that day and at one point I was pretty exasperated. Maybe it's a boy thing to be playfully annoying. Still, I thoroughly enjoy his company and look forward to meeting him again. I don't remember what we talked about. I only remember that there were a lot of repetitious nonsense and fluff and me facepalming constantly. Maybe I'd hope that we could talk about more substantial stuff like quantum physics or the Cultural Revolution or comparative theology and yes I'm being facetious. We walked KLCC Park after our late lunch to help with digestion and deeply regretted our decision to go on the swings. The sun was hiding so the weather was nice so we sat on a bench and continued our frivolous banter. It started to drizzle at one point and we coolly walked back into the mall and had gelato. We could have two flavors in a cone so I had cappuccino and lime (weird combo, I don't know why I chose those sigh -- I generally don't perform well under pressure.. but they tasted good separately la, the lime one in particular). In between, he went for prayers and I read my book, and because he has a poor sense of direction he got lost coming back to where I was and I thought that was amusing. Sorry that I had a good chuckle, all my direction-challenged peeps (love you sis). We went shopping for his stuff after that. He got a new pair of work shoes, which according to him, was the first pair of shoes he bought for himself. Achievement unlocked! We were still kinda full from lunch so we had a simple dinner at the food court (I had a drink) and called it a day. We sang in the car otw way back to his place, as we usually do, but mostly it was him singing because he doesn't like my songs -_- (Jv went through my entire CD of 50 songs the other day when I sent him home after dinner, commenting on every single one of them -- too radio friendly, too old, so pretentious, too mellow, so passe, Leehom again?, too Regina Spektor wannabe blah blah). Oi, I tak tanya pun. Srsly, boys. -_- But really, boys! ^_^

So, that was Saturday and it was great and I went to bed (after finishing Steins;Gate) in bliss.

On Sunday morning, I woke up at 6:36AM and got ready just in time for A to pick me up at 7 before we headed to J's and then S's place. It was our forest reserve outing day! Yay! We were all groggy from lack of sleep and the unearthly hours, except for A who was inexplicably perky the whole day, having woken up 5:30AM and being on chauffeur duty the whole day. Maybe we were good company, us three sloths. S made us coffee and J was a happy camper. It didn't do much for me I think. We got to FRIM in Kepong around 8 and chose a spot to park and had brekkie at a resting hut before beginning our grueling... 10-minute hike. Haha! Yeah it was a short hike, before a long descend of about an hour. When we got back on gravel road I decided to run the rest of the way, so that I could sweat more and also because I had a tummy ache hehe. Left the forest reserve at about 11 to Desa ParkCity for Kb, which was a disappointing affair.. save for the brinjal fries and wasabi and garlic sauces which were awesome. The rice burger.. nah. Then we went lying on grass under a tree in the park. The sun was out but the breeze was cooling so we laid there and tried to sleep but couldn't. I loved that lying on the grass bit. Then we went to this other restaurant A, which was a worse outing than Kb. We had terrible pasta and a mushroom pizza that didn't live up to its name and we paid RM25 per pax. I was annoyed. We sat in the restaurant for a couple of hours as we were still lethargic. J browsed through salon.com and was reading from lists like "25 things men do to show that they are interested in you" or "10 things that men look for in the first impression". It was hilarious dissecting these trying-too-hard lists. J then brought up the idea of going for one of those puzzle room places that are quite popular these days and we decided we should just do it. I've always wanted to go and check one out, and although I didn't think we were in the right frame of mind to do it that day, we went ahead and booked ourselves a place at the Es-ca-pe Room in eCurve. Suffice to say, we failed spectacularly. As per the words of the guy who came to get us when our time was up, "You guys are still in this room ah?" Yes we are. Boo hoo. It was fun though, although I don't think it's something I'd excel in. After that, since I was much poorer financially compared to the start of the day, we went to eat at a hawker center where we all had piping hot nasi lemak and grilled chicken wings and lobak and we were completely exhausted but in good spirits. A dropped us home after that. I practically crawled under my blanket and for the first time in a while, slept by 10ish.

So, that was Sunday and it was awesome and I went to bed deliriously happy.

luv, E.

Is it Friday night or Saturday morning? I'd say both. It's been some fairly long couple of weeks being busy with work, which was altogether tiring but good. Work does give us a sense of purpose so I'm not complaining. There were some ups and downs but nothing too major that I'd wanna write about. Racked up some sleep debt and have been trying to pay it off the whole week, except for tonight, because no one does that on a Friday night. Got home from work early today and spent the evening watching this awesome anime on time travel which I hope to write about - just two more episodes to go! Anticipating an awesome weekend ahead, which would be over before I knew it but ah, gonna live in the moment and not think about Monday for now.

Mm random comment, the new Selangor MB has been sworn in. Honestly, I don't like this fella and I don't trust him and srsly, he needs to spend the rest of these few years in office making up for the past three months. I don't know if he'd ever gain my trust, but who am I right? Good night.

I hope I won't forget what they mean to me..



「やっとまた会えたね」
懐かしい君の声がする
気付けば僕らは宙に浮かびあがって
時に追いやられ

“We finally meet again”
I hear the familiar sound of your voice
Before I know it, we’re floating in the air
Chasing after time

Galileo Galilei :: Circle Game

It's past midnight, and I should be focusing on my work: editing a piece of article on reforestation so that I could go to sleep but me being me......... I spent the last 15 minutes researching and putting together this description of my current craving, one that I developed over the past few days but have yet to satiate:

thin crispy crust base, slightly burnt but soft inside covered with a layer of zesty tomato sauce with hints of basil, oregano and garlic, and topped with mushroom, spicy pepperoni, sizzling Italian sausage & ground beef and a generous amount of rocket leaves, and just oozing with mozarella and parmesan! 

yea, me hankering for a slice of that heaven now. :(

there's new band in my world...

In April 2012, I got into Mandopop via Leehom; one and half year later in September 2013, it was hip-hop and Mr Slim Shady himself. Now, twelve months later, ladies and gentlemen, may I present to you my obsession du jour, Japanese indie pop-rock band, Galileo Galilei. Ta-dah!

I first heard them from the Anohana opening song, Blue Bookmark/Aoi Shiori, and when I checked that song out in Youtube, it turned out they also did another song for the anime, called Circle Game. For me, when I chance upon two songs that I take to immediately from a new band or musician, I would check out their other songs (I don't usually do it if I like just one song, so the second song has to somehow come by serendipitously hehe).. and then I clicked on the link to Swan and guess what, I liked it! So with three hits in a row, that was it lah, I have my new favorite band! I was thisclose to buying their album, but alas, it's only available on iTunes Japan. So err, I went the yarrr! polly wants a cracker way. And to uploaders and torrentors of obscure bands' discography -- YOU DA REAL MVP *two thumps on chest + peace sign* ILAPYOUDANKEW.. 

Me reading up on LH and Em

So, the band. Man, these boys are young! The lead singer/songwriter Yuki Ozaki is only 23 this year. There are only three ppl in the band now, including Yuki's brother Kazuki who plays the drums/percussion and bassist Hitoshi Sako -- you could read a bit about how they came to be here from this fan page here. Sadly I don't think they are that popular (judging from their album sale figures), plus this being a Japanese band, so I don't have much scoop on them. But 'sokay.. I'm used to liking lesser known bands and am well acquainted with having a dearth of info/goss on them. Well, it keeps me somewhat sane haha -- I remember when I first got into LH or Em and was presented with opulent buffets of available reading materials on them that made me all wide eyed and ravenous, the way I went digging and consuming details about them was almost a cause for concern! :P

And you know what. Lyrics schmyrics! So much for my insistence that I like songs with meaningful lyrical contents. I don't know what these guys are singing about, but I love the songs! :) I'll get to the words later, but for now, check these out and tell me you love them too:

I paused and cupped the moment in my hand. I felt its tickling warmth. I scanned the room and took in what I would. The sunlight coming in through the window. The balmy breeze. My books. The smell of the newly changed bed sheet. The clean floor. The thought of you. I am happy. :)

I'm in that stage of my cold where I'm not incapacitated by what's just a heavy head, running nose, mild cough and itchy throat. It's not bad enough to make me want to start popping pills or chugging cough syrup but it's bad enough that I'm rather irritable and all I want to do is to curl up in bed and watch some new anime I picked up from a Quora thread and doze off. But of course of I have a speech to rewrite and a stack of info to rake through and an email to shoot off, all which I've already put off for one day. But of course I'm procrastinating.

Sometimes I think my life is a continual stream of sadness, a quiet and unremarkable trip downriver that comes with once-in-a-lifetime views on both banks, a journey periodically punctuated by a boulder of happiness or a sheer drop of excitement, followed by meandering bends of curiosities or wild rapids of uncertainties; rinse and repeat and unstoppable until one day when I find myself in the big blue.

Row, row, row you boat
Gently down the stream
Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily
Life is but a dream.

This is the most moving piece I've read in a while. Maybe because the subject matter is close to my heart. The very mention of pedophilia would usually send me heaving and panting in rage screaming bloody castration on the perpetrators, so reading this was kinda agonizing, because it humanizes the very group of people I detest with all my soul. Granted, the person in the story hasn't committed any crime, but still.. I felt an incredible sense of sadness and sympathy reading this. I pray for strength and courage for the person, and his fellow "strugglers". I still hate everything to do with this, but I found compassion for them. :(

Okay, I don't know what I did, but now all photos I've uploaded here are gone. All I see is that grey No Entry sign. It must have happened when I  muck up the Settings on Google Photos. Gargh! I don't quite know how to fix this. Bleh, have to trawl forums again. Grr. *annoyed*

***

I love working in the dead of the night. The quietness helps me to focus -- also the fact that if I had to work such hours means that a deadline is breathing down my neck. Alas, my aged body is vehemently against such arrangement. Today I am paying the price for staying up late on Monday night with my runny nose and scratchy throat and a body screaming for sleep. At least I got some work done.

Five months after the show's ended, I still feel a slight pang when I catch a glimpse of them on TV or read about them online. I wonder how affected I really am. Whoever knew I could be so sensitive. Whatever reason do I have to feel so entitled?

Leehom's new single, Lose Myself 忘我 feat. DJ Avicii is finally out! I loved it immediately, I don't know what it is about yet, but the tune is pretty awesome. C-pop + EDM FTW! :) Can't wait to download it from iTunes and set it to countless repeat! :)

Here's this link to the song, but it is not from his official channel, so I don't know if this is leaked. It's already going around on FB right now. I remember though that the release date was supposed to be today. We'll see. I'll embed the YouTube vid here when his channel posts it up.

Mm the point of this post is two-pronged: to celebrate the release of the song, and also to show the kind of weirdo I am, one who's fixated on what most might consider trivial and has the need to point out typos and stuff by making a comment on the video and then proceed to blog about it at 2:45AM when she should really be trying to finish her work. I am pissed off at myself tonight, and I'm trying to distract myself from dwelling on that I guess, even though doing this is making it worse. Sigh, someone please humour me.

Anyway, I can't help it! I made that comment below for the poster to fix his name, but the entire title bugs me very much. Other than the L in his name, the F in Feat. should be lowercase too. There shouldn't be a space between Myself and the colon (some people like it like that, perhaps for the visual balance, but it's not a generally accepted convention. I don't think the colon is necessary at all here.

The title should go like this: Wang Leehom feat. Avicii - Lose Myself 忘我

So yeah kthnxbai.



Edit 2/9/14 - Woot! They fixed it. ^^

It seems like all I write about these days are so-called reviews of books and TV and movies huh? :) I don't know why I do it because I am a terrible reviewer -- my opinions are usually either "I love it!" or "I hated it!" but to justify them, I need to read other reviews to find the words to properly express my thoughts. So what you read that you thought were my thoughts (when I wasn't literally copy-pasting chunks of those text because I was too lazy to even reword them), were actually my little Frankenstein's monsters -- butchered and sewn together opinions of other people in a form of a somewhat readable prose. Ta-dah. I suppose I do it for the same reason why I wrote the other posts: for my older self to remember what my younger self enjoyed (or not). Okay, this time for a change I'll give you something that's entirely my own take.

So I finally read Yale law professor Amy Chua's (in)famous book that created this massive parenting debate worldwide when it came out three years ago: Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother. I remember thinking then, wow all these controversies and uproar.. the book must be selling like hot cakes! Ka-ching! I've read excerpts from the book then and knew of the terror that Chua was, but I also remember being very impressed by her daughters' achievements.

So what did I think of this? The book -- totally enjoyed reading it! I haven't finished a book this fast in a long time. It was easy to read, and I was rather entertained and horrified at the same time. Her daughters -- much respect for what they have done and how well adjusted they appear to be. The mother -- needless to say, is scary beyond all reason (sorry, random cheeky quote from The Emperor's New Groove). She is the epitome of a melancholy choleric, and her ways would totally not stand out among Asian parents, especially immigrants or 2nd-gens. And if I were her daughter, I'm surer than sure that I'd be the black sheep who is only talked about in hushed tones at family dinners and who's forever cowering in my sisters' shadows.

But you know what, maybe it's the Asian in me, coupled with hindsight... I totally get where Chua was coming from and actually wish that I had a Tiger mom.

*cue collective gasps from phantom pro-"Western" style of parenting readers*

Haha! I do! Now, I'm not blaming my very Chinese parents who for some reason never really pushed me for letting me do whatever I'd wanted (that said, I was never a wild, rebellious child - I'd say that I was a goody two shoes *cough cough*).. but knowing me, I am the kind of person who needs discipline and would do well when pushed, even though I'd hate every minute of it with every fiber of my being. Yes, I can't win this! Alas, it's too late for me now, but I really still need to find some other way to kick my own ass, and I need to find it fast.

Btw I don't think there's a one best way of parenting. As illustrated by Chua, what worked with her eldest backfired when applied on the younger daughter. Still, I think it worked out for them in the end, soooo.. good for them! :)

__________
Edit 1/9/14: 
Chua's eldest daughter wrote an open letter in defense of her mother after the controversy broke out, which I thought was a thoughtful piece. Something she said there struck me: "Everybody seems to think art is spontaneous. But Tiger Mom, you taught me that even creativity takes effort." While that's nothing new, that line, seen together with the relentless drills the girls were subjected to their entire lives, serves as a stark reminder as to why I am so errm.. unaccomplished: I haven't poured in much hours into anything I like. 

How does passion work? How is it ignited? How much could or should it be forced before one lets go and lets nature takes it course? I want that - to be over the top crazy about something.. Haha, perhaps something like my LH crazy fangirl phase, but with something more useful. I liked that I did all those translation works on his songs and that speech. I enjoyed working on them tremendously, and I really want something like that again, something more.. lasting this time. What could it be!? Please God don't let me turn 40 without finding whatever it is that I'm looking for.

Ah I have never been so let down!

I was really excited when I was browsing through the movies playing this weekend and stumbled upon this. Like SUPER CRAY CRAY CAN'T KEEP IT IN excited. I've loved Conan since forever, a remnant from my teenage years (I've this weird crush on him, or more appropriately, Shinichi - the 17-year-old who Conan really is before he was poisoned by the Black Organisation and reduced to a 7-year-old boy). Whodunit + manga = perfecto.

Along the way, I stopped reading when left home.. until I discovered online manga. I am still very far behind from catching up, but it's so fun to re-read the old cases and remembering all the details -- for someone with my kinda memory, I think it's pretty remarkable how much I have retained.

So yeah, by the time I saw the ad, I realised that it was going off screen by next week, and that I only had yesterday to go watch. It was only showing once a day in Pavilion and MV GSC cinemas, but only MV's timing was good so I was pretty determined to brave through Friday's rush hour traffic to catch it. Got A to go with me, but I was so excited I would have gone alone. For some reason, I've never bothered with the anime (I've always preferred manga) so this was actually my first time seeing it in this format.. :)

But argh, this show just didn't do it for me. The plot was uninteresting - it was like watching a normal procedural drama on TV, and there was hardly any smart detective work, and there were too many new characters (FBI la, Ran's classmate lah, that Silver Bullet guy la.. I suspect they are from the previous shows - this being the 20th installment, but they just diluted the plot further), and the English lines were really, really bad (there was this line "say hello to Hunter in hell" that the writers must have thought was so amazing that they had the character repeat it, like what?! -___-"), and when the killer was revealed, I was like "huh?" than "wow!", and there were so many physical law-defying stunts, and the ending was kinda contrived and unimpressive.. I really didn't like it lah - and I had really wanted to. Sigh. A told me he fell asleep towards the end - yup, I don't blame him. Bleh.

Anyway, the plot, from wiki:

After participating in the opening ceremony, Conan, Agasa, Ran, and the Detective Boys are enjoying the view from the observation deck of the 635-metre tall Bell Tree Tower. Suddenly, a bullet breaks through a window and strikes a man's chest, causing everyone to panic. Conan stays calm and uses the zoom function on his tracking glasses to follow the path of the bullet to its source. At the other end, Conan spies a black shadow. "But sniping from so far away is impossible, it can't be--!" Conan and Masumi Sera pursue the fleeing sniper on Masumi's motorcycle, but the chase takes a violent turn when the suspect attempts to blow up police patrol cars. Even the FBI get involved in the chase, but the culprit and the mysteries of the sniping end up vanishing into the ocean.

The investigation turns up a connection to the special United States Navy squadron, the Navy SEALS and other former US military officers working in Japan. However, the first sniping was just the beginning; as more people are shot, the citizens of Tokyo panic! What is the meaning of the rifle case and dice left behind? As his investigation progresses, Conan soon finds himself in the sniper's crosshairs, only to be saved by Masumi who intervenes and takes the bullet in his stead. And, in the background, Subaru Okiya begins to make his move...

So I watched two other shows today. Hahaha! This is indeed an awesome weekend. IF ONLY TMRW'S NOT MONDAYYYY. *cries*

First up: Megamind. A was raving about it a few weeks back and insisted that I should watch this, together with Cloudy With A Chance of Meatballs. He said that the humour should be up my alley. So I watched la. J also caught it last night -- that woman is desperate hahaha! I think she's watched every single Hollywood produced movie or documentary out there (part exaggeration, but not too far from the truth hehe!). Well, she said, and I'm quoting her verbatim, "I'm scraping the bottom of the barrel"...

So, Megamind. I think it was pretty good, although I lol'd only like.. once? (when Megamind confronted the hero-turn-villain he created, Titan/Tighten, and told him that the difference between a villain and a super villain is in the showmanship -- okay, that doesn't sound funny when I wrote it down here, it's just something you just gotta see it to appreciate haha) But still, it was entertaining, and it's got a good storyline, pacing and likable characters.. if you're looking for mindless fun, this would be the show to catch.

Next, I watched The Internet's Own Boy: The Story of Aaron Swartz, a documentary on this geeky outspoken (a.k.a. alpha nerd) co-founder of Reddit, who also worked on the development of RSS and Creative Commons, and helped lead the successful protest against federal copyright law PIPA/SOPA in 2012, etc. He believed that academic journals should be freely available (because many were funded by government grants/taxpayers' money and there's no reason why private corporations should make more money off them). Anyway, he was caught systematically downloading journals (by the millions) from JSTOR and was about to be prosecuted when he hanged himself.

And this made me cry! It's so heartbreaking la, he was such a bright young man and his intentions are noble. Sure the documentary was one-sided, but a victim's a victim and everyone's got sides to take so I'm on his lor.. Watching this made me wish I was working with computers and not in communications, but that is a rant for another day...

So I just finished watch a tear-jerker J-drama, 1 Litre no Namida (リットルの涙, lit. "1 Litre of Tears"; also called A Diary with Tears or A Diary of Tears) about a girl who was diagnosed with an incurable degenerative disease at 15. Normally I would not touch this genre with a 10-ft pole, but Dz highly recommended it and a quick read of some reviews echoed that, so I decided to jump into it.

At 11 episodes, I thought it was pretty manageable for a weekend binge watching. I was also curious about my reaction towards tear-jerkers. After my previous outing with Anohana, I was admittedly a leeettle disturbed by the fact that I didn't shed any tear while the other reviewers were crying buckets. While I rarely, if ever, cry watching dramas and even think it's funny when say that I may have a heart of stone, I did wonder why I am like that especially because it doesn't jive with the emo person that I am.

But going into the show with those thoughts was perhaps where my "experiment" got off on the wrong foot. I knew it was a sappy movie, so my guard was up and I probably subconsciously kept it so throughout. And it being a drama, my patience started to wear thin halfway in, and that was after I discovered the Speed button on Youtube (where I caught the show) and proceeded to watch the show at 2x. That coupled with the lack of audio half the time due to music copyright issue resulting in me watching a lot of the second part of the show in silent, so I might have been a little detached from it all. The only tear I ended up shedding was from yawning. All these notwithstanding, I will try to give a somewhat objective thought on the movie, with the help of hindsight..

First, a quick synopsis (courtesy of Wiki):

Fifteen-year-old Ikeuchi Aya is an ordinary girl, soon to be high school student and daughter of a family who works at a shop that makes tofu. As time passes, unusual things start happening to Aya. She begins falling down often and walking strangely. Her mother Shioka, takes Aya to see the doctor, and he informs Shioka that Aya has spinocerebellar degeneration - a rare disease where the cerebellum of the brain gradually deteriorates to the point where the victim cannot walk, speak, write, or eat. A cruel disease, as it does not affect the mind. The script is based on the diary Aya kept writing until she could no longer hold a pen.

So... after all those things I said earlier, I actually liked the show. While I'm not gushing about it, I think it has its merits and definitely more going for it than I give it credit for. For me, let's see.. I liked that it was based on a real-life account (with photos of the real Aya during each credit run) -- the thought that this really happened to someone made it more real, more sobering. Her optimism and strength was inspiring in the face of the nightmare her conditions were turning into (she would soon be difficult to walk, talk and even eat -- for a 15yo active girl, I couldn't think of a worse place to be).

I thought the acting all around was pretty good, esp the lead actress (Sawajiri Erika).. I could partially feel her pain, her fears, her not wanting to trouble people, and I cringed at her awkward attempts to walk, move, etc. However, I felt I was quick to distance myself from feeling too much. I think it's because the idea of losing control of one's body and speech and yet still having an alert mind deeply terrifies me and I don't really wanna dwell on them.

I also liked how her sister's character evolved, she who'd always lived in her shadow coming out into her own. I like her parents and their range of emotions and reaction. I think everything was believable (given that it's based on a real person, it should la) -- except mayyyybe the guy interest (then again, he's a fictional character, so maybe that's why.. even his family was kinda 2D and the tragedy linked to them cliched). But I liked that they didn't focus too much on the romance bit (esp since it technically didn't happen), but it was sad nevertheless knowing that they couldn't be together. Since the show is largely based on Aya's diary entries, I liked that they used actual quotes, again a reminder that this actually happened. But maybe because I've been watching anime a lot, I kept converting the scenes into animated sequence in my head as I watch the show. I thought that was quite funny. :)

Anyway, I don't think I'll be catching any drama anytime soon. I might make an exception if it was in anime format though.. but really, who knows.

brain teaser

Quick, do you know this symbol Ψ is and what you get when you add it to my name??

No? Hehe! You get ...

Geddit, geddit?!?

...

That, exactly! Hahahaahah!

...

Welllll, you see... Ψ is Psi, i.e. the 23rd letter of the Greek alphabet.. and is commonly used in physics to represent wave functions in quantum mechanics, such as in the Schrödinger equation and bra–ket notation: \langle\phi|\psi\rangle.. blah blah blah..

Anywayyy, this is what happens when you put that symbol in my name:
ELLIS + Ψ
= ELLIS + PSI
= Ellipsis i.e. ...



XD XD XD


HAHAHAHAHAH I WAS SQUEALING IN DELIGHT (and in silence too -- man that was hard!!!) when the light bulb went off. Yes, yes, I'm easily amused. :D :D :D

*HEART*

I started walking/running again, yesterday being my second time in as many weeks. It's been a long time coming, ever since I stopped last year due to err.. inclement weather or sumfink like that lol! I might have ran a couple of times in the meantime, but it's really been close to a year since I donned my running shoes and sweat it out at KLCC Park. I really hope to continue doing it once weekly, for it's getting harder and harder to shed those weight.. *dripping w sarcasm* thanksssssss, age.

Anyhoo, running. Look at all these inspirational posters... aren't they... inspirational? What a romantic, lofty view eh.

If only they worked on me!

This is no secret but the truth is... I HATE running.

All I want to do is to lie down like a slug on my couch and stuff my face with potato chips drowned in chili cheese and still be able to fit into a size 4 dress. Yes, that is how it should be.

Most people might find running therapeutic and that they are able to focus and think about stuff and all. Or like Olympian Eric Liddell who said he was born to run and so felt God's pleasure when he was running.

When I run, all I could think about is WHEN WOULD THIS END? WHY DO I THIS? HOW LONG MORE? CAN I QUIT NOW? Tsk tsk. This happens every. single. time.

Everyone has a calling... this isn't mine la. You know what am I made for?

EATING. I feel such pleasure when I eat yummy food. Like that piping hot bowl of fish head I had last night? That was DIVINE. Nasi lemak? Tandoori chicken? Bak kut teh? Curry? Grilled lamb? Pasta carbonara? Roast duck? Rendang? Roast pork? Claypot rice? THESE ARE STUFF LIFE IS MADE OFF OKAY.

Sigh..... so for you food oh glorious food, I shall hit the track again next week and the week after and endure that grueling 50 minutes so that guilt would slide off me while I go for that second helping. Nom nom. :)

Btw, I actually like walking. I think I can cover quite a distance on foot. So why don't I walk right? Because it takes forever to cover my usual route. And also because ambling doesn't cut it. It burns so few calories I'd be wasting my time. I actually alternate between running and brisk walking, because I just don't have the stamina to run 5km continuously.. so there.

Haha, look at me, blogging about food while fasting. Tsk tsk! *beams*

I found this anime through an unexpected route. It started when I was again feeling pretty much despaired at the state the world is in now, i.e. having another weltschmerz episode (first world problem much? sigh).. So I was reading the wikipedia entry for that word, when it explains it as a "psychological pain caused by sadness... caused by the inappropriateness and cruelty of the world and (physical and social) circumstances". It continues to say that weltschmerz "can cause depression, resignation and escapism, and can become a mental problem (compare Hikikomori)". So I clicked on Hikikomori which is what they call "reclusive adolescents or adults who withdraw from social life, often seeking exceptional degrees of isolation and confinement." Now, I am a little of all that resigned depresso escapee thingy and often dream about taking off to some remote corner of the world but this sounded really extreme and depressing! Anyway, somewhere in the page was also a note to how it's portrayed in popular culture, and anime/manga in particular. There was a list of probably 5-7 titles, and I randomly clicked on one of them and ended up on this wiki page. I kinda liked the synopsis, but I wanted some assurance that this is worth it so I asked Dz if he'd watched the show before and what he thought of it. Turned out, he has, and he'd thought of recommending it to me, but because I'd told him earlier that I wasn't super keen on tear-jerkers, he didn't. Glad I still found my way to it - perhaps it's meant to be hehe!

Anyway.... Anohana: The Flower We Saw That Day (あの日見た花の名前を僕達はまだ知らない。 Ano Hi Mita Hana no Namae o Bokutachi wa Mada Shiranai, lit. "We Still Don't Know the Name of the Flower We Saw That Day.")(whaat a mouthful!!)(thankfully, it also goes by Anohana for short) is about "a group of six childhood friends who drifted apart after one of them, Meiko "Menma" Honma, dies in an accident. Ten years after the incident, the leader of the group, Jinta Yadomi, has withdrawn from society and lives as a recluse. One summer day, the ghost of an older looking Menma appears before him and asks to have a wish granted, reasoning that she cannot pass on into the afterlife until it is fulfilled. At first, he only tries to help her minimally because he thinks he is hallucinating. But since Menma does not remember what her wish is, Jinta gathers his estranged friends together once again, believing that they are the key to resolving this problem. All of friends join him, though most of them reluctantly. However, things grow increasingly complicated when his friends accuse him of not being able to get over the death of Menma, for Jinta is the only one who can see Menma's ghost and his friends think he is seeing things. But as things progress, it is realized that Jinta is not the only person in the group who is having trouble letting go of the past. It is revealed that a majority of the group members blame themselves for Menma's death and hidden feelings for other members of the group are rekindled. Along with feelings of bitterness from Menma's parents, the group struggles as they grow from trying to help Menma move on, to helping themselves move on, too." (Thanks, Wiki! =)

So, what was the verdict? :) I like it a lot, so much so that I think I love it! (Don't ask..) I'm still feeling the lingering sadness.. but it didn't make me cry... but then again, I'm a tough nut to crack in that department. I guess I'm just wired differently. Okay, I don't think my review will ever give this show justice, so I'm just going to copy+paste the best write-up on the show that I came across:

In terms of peripheries, the show delivers. The character designs are varied and pretty and the music is spot on for what is an emotional show. The animation has no readily noticeable flaws and the detail shown in the interactions between characters is one of the key qualities of the show's overall experience. The basic premise for the show is also a great starting point. The concept of close friends who have drifted apart is an affecting one and one I am sure most people can relate to without much difficulty. The breakdown of relationships, with all the regret and ill feeling that goes with it, is well portrayed and explored over such a short number of episodes. In terms of plotting, Anohana is a show that uses its runtime astonishingly well for the most part (exceptions will be discussed later) - the pacing is excellent and its emotional highs arrive without reservation or a hint of deviance. I never once got the sense that the show was wandering, the makers always seeming to have the plot and its steady progression well in hand.

In the end, with a show that centres on metaphorical burnt bridges, it was always going to be the characters and their relationships that would make or break this show. Jintan, the lead, is a character that it would be easy to hate; he is gloomy, static and prone to self-pitying sulks. The rest of the living friends aren't much better: Anaru is a weak-willed tsundere, Tsuruko is bitchy and snarky, Yukiatsu is hateful and creepy and Poppo tries so hard to be fun and carefree it is almost painful to watch (yet he is still the most likeable). But you said this show was good, I hear you say? It is, it is - that is the beauty of character development. Despite being quite negative characters, each one has at least something positive and emphatic that makes them worthwhile; the sheer volume of well-portrayed unrequited love amongst the cast and the individual ways that each character approaches those feelings and the feelings they have over Menma's death are varied, interesting and relatable. The frustrating aspects of each character never go far enough to be repulsive (not even Yukiatsu, though he certainly pushes it) and in the end I found myself backing each of them despite their more annoying aspects. Where the characterisation does go wrong is in the character of Menma. In a story populated by flawed but interesting characters, she stands out like a cardboard cut-out at a waxworks - coming across completely flat. It's understandable considering her position as a less developed (and less warped) character but even if she were to exist as little more than a plot device (she is more than that but her development over the series is definitely the most limited) then at least they could have made her a little less annoying. Just a little bit. She is certainly not a failure as a character, she is a core part of Jintan's growth, but I have met people who abandoned this series because of the volume of screen time she enjoys, especially at the beginning of the show.

Overall, though, this series achieves what it set out to do. The strong characterisation and solid story pacing allows for those big drama moments to hit hard and it rounds itself off as an enjoyable, beautiful spectacle throughout and especially at the end. If you are looking for a subtle, affecting show then this is not it but it is a well written, beautiful and often moving show and well worth a look for those looking for a little less 'animé' in their animé.

[full review here]

Haha, that was easy! Sorry I took all the shortcuts but I really just wanted to do a quick post about this show.. I thoroughly recommend this series! Stream it here.

One more thing: one of the best things about this show was the ending song. I usually skip the opening and ending songs when I watch anime (except for first episodes, just to check the songs out), but I made an exception for this show. This was the first time I'd listened through the entire opening and ending song every episode. Super love it!



Secret Base
Kayano Ai & Tomatsu Haruka & Hayami Saori
Ending song to the anime Anohana

君と夏の終わり　将来の夢　
Kimi to natsu no owari shourai no yume
大きな希望　忘れない
Ookina kibou wasurenai
10年後の8月
Juu nen go no hachigatsu
また出会えるのを　信じて
Mata deaeru no wo shinjite
最高の思い出を…
Saikou no omoide wo...
The end of the summer with you
Our dreams for the future, the big hopes, I won’t forget them
Believing that I’ll meet you again in August, ten years from now
The best memories…

出会いは　ふっとした　瞬間　帰り道の交差点で　
Deai wa futto shita shunkan kaerimichi no kousaten de
声をかけてくれたね　「一緒に帰ろう」
Koe wo kakete kureta ne "issho ni kaerou"
僕は　照れくさそうに　カバンで顔を隠しながら
Boku wa terekusa sou ni kaban de kao wo kakushi nagara
本当は　とても　とても　嬉しかったよ
Hontou wa totemo totemo ureshikatta yo
Our meeting was that one moment, on the way home at the intersection
You said to me, “Let’s walk home together”
I hid my face behind my bag, but really, I was very very happy

あぁ　花火が夜空　きれいに咲いて　ちょっとセツナク
Aa hanabi ga yozora kirei ni saite chotto setsunaku
あぁ　風が時間とともに　流れる
Aa kaze ga jikan to tomo ni nagareru
嬉しくって　楽しくって　冒険も　いろいろしたね
Ureshiku tte tanoshiku tte bouken mo iroiro shita ne
二人の　秘密の　基地の中
Futari no himitsu no kichi no naka
Ah, the fireworks bloom beautifully in the night sky, a little sad
Ah, the wind blows along with time, being happy, having fun
We went on many adventures too inside our secret base

君と夏の終わり　将来の夢　大きな希望　忘れない
Kimi to natsu no owari shourai no yume Ookina kibou wasurenai
10年後の8月　また出会えるのを　信じて
Juu nen go no hachigatsu mata deaeru no wo shinjite
君が最後まで　心から　「ありがとう」
Kimi ga saigo made kokoro kara "arigatou" Sakendeita koto
叫んでいたこと　知っていたよ
Shiteita yo
涙をこらえて　笑顔でさよなら　せつないよね
Namida wo koraete egao de sayonara setsunai yo ne
最高の思い出を…
Saikou no omoide wo...
The end of the summer with you
Our dreams for the future, the big hopes, I won’t forget them
Believing that I’ll meet you again in August, ten years from now
I know you shouted, “thank you” from your heart, till the end
Holding tears back, smiling a goodbye
It was sad, the best memories…

あぁ　夏休みも　あと少しで　終わっちゃうから
Aa natsuyasumi mo ato sukoshi de owacchau kara
あぁ　太陽と月　仲良くして
Aa taiyou to tsuki nakayoku shite
悲しくって　寂しくって　喧嘩も　いろいろしたね
Kanashiku tte sabishiku tte kenka mo iroiro shita ne
二人の　秘密の　基地の中
Futari no himitsu no kichi no naka
Ah, summer vacation is almost over
So I hope that the sun and moon get along
Being sad, and being lonely
We fought a lot inside our secret base


君が最後まで　心から　「ありがとう」叫んでいたこと　
Kimi ga saigo made kokoro kara "arigatou" sakendeita koto
知っていたよ
Shiteita yo
涙をこらえて　笑顔でさよなら　せつないよね
Namida wo koraete egao de sayonara setsunai yo ne
最高の思い出を…
Saikou no omoide wo...
I know you shouted, “thank you” from your heart, till the end
Holding tears back, smiling a goodbye, it was sad
The best memories…


突然の　転校で　どうしようもなく
Totsuzen no tenkou de dou shiyou mo naku
手紙　書くよ　電話もするよ　忘れないでね　僕のことを
Tegami kaku yo denwa mo suru yo Wasurenaide ne boku no koto wo
いつまでも　二人の　基地の中
itsumademo futari no kichi no naka
I can’t do anything about a sudden transferring to another school
I’ll write letters, I’ll call you, so don’t forget me
Inside our secret base

君と夏の終わり　ずっと話して　
Kimi to natsu no owari zutto hanashite
夕日を見てから星を眺め
Yuuhi wo mite kara hoshi wo nagame
君の頬を　流れた涙は　ずっと忘れない
Kimi no hoho wo nagareta namida wa zutto wasurenai
君が最後まで　大きく手を振ってくれたこと　
Kimi ga saigo made ookikute wo futtekureta koto
きっと忘れない
Kitto wasurenai
だから　こうして　夢の中で　ずっと永遠に…
Dakara kou shite yume no naka de zutto eien ni...
I talked to you at the end of summer
Looking at the sunset and watching the stars
I’ll never forget the tear that rolled down your cheek
I’ll never forget you, waving your hands till the end
So forever, like this, in our dreams…

君と夏の終わり　将来の夢　大きな希望　忘れない
Kimi to natsu no owari shourai no yume Ookina kibou wasurenai
10年後の8月　また出会えるのを　信じて
Juu nen go no hachigatsu mata deaeru no wo shinjite
君が最後まで　心から　「ありがとう」叫んでいたこと
Kimi ga saigo made kokoro kara "arigatou" sakendeita koto
知っていたよ
Shiteita yo
涙をこらえて　笑顔でさよなら　せつないよね
Namida wo koraete egao de sayonara setsunai yo ne
最高の思い出を…
Saikou no omoide wo...
The end of the summer with you
Our dreams for the future, the big hopes, I won’t forget them
Believing that I’ll meet you again in August, ten years from now
I know you shouted, “thank you” from your heart, till the end
Holding tears back, smiling a goodbye, it was sad
The best memories…

最高の思い出を…
Saikou no omoide wo...
The best memories…